I have some tattoo's scheduled soon (we shall call them gifts, as they are costing me nil, so no cracks about wasting money...until later in the post!) I really think I should rearrange all my plans and have SLACKER tattooed somewhere very visible, but tasteful. You know, like perhaps across my knuckles with an exclamation point at the end! Yes I have thought far enough ahead to figure out the logistics of digits.
See I am that woman whose house is always a wreck, the Mom that always forgets to return the book order forms, and the field trip paper, and the holiday candy, and the library books. I will just go ahead and admit it, because everyone knows it's true. If you have ever visited my house unannounced you know that the dishes are always piled up, toys are everywhere, laundry either needs washed, folded or both...I am a slacker!
Today I set out to scrub this house. Since I have been single it has gotten out of control. At least when I was married I had a grown up in the house to answer to, to some extent. (Maybe I need to hire someone to give a shit, pay them to come in and point out how ridiculous this really is!) Perhaps I have just reverted back to my teenage years. It happens...
So I am washing the dishes, as there is not a single clean dish in the house, all the while thinking "I am never letting this happen again" "This is ridiculous" "Uggh I hate dishes". Finally I have come up with a brilliant plan! It will work! And it will end this awful habit of mine. I am throwing out the dishes! I shall make a party out of it, invite all my friends and dirty them up with some yummy Greek food and cry out "Opa!" as we toss them outside against the barn!
That's why God made paper plates right...and plastic cutlery, disposable containers, plastic bags?...I just attained the Carbon Footprint of Bigfoot! My feet are pretty big already...shit.
See I am that woman whose house is always a wreck, the Mom that always forgets to return the book order forms, and the field trip paper, and the holiday candy, and the library books. I will just go ahead and admit it, because everyone knows it's true. If you have ever visited my house unannounced you know that the dishes are always piled up, toys are everywhere, laundry either needs washed, folded or both...I am a slacker!
Today I set out to scrub this house. Since I have been single it has gotten out of control. At least when I was married I had a grown up in the house to answer to, to some extent. (Maybe I need to hire someone to give a shit, pay them to come in and point out how ridiculous this really is!) Perhaps I have just reverted back to my teenage years. It happens...
So I am washing the dishes, as there is not a single clean dish in the house, all the while thinking "I am never letting this happen again" "This is ridiculous" "Uggh I hate dishes". Finally I have come up with a brilliant plan! It will work! And it will end this awful habit of mine. I am throwing out the dishes! I shall make a party out of it, invite all my friends and dirty them up with some yummy Greek food and cry out "Opa!" as we toss them outside against the barn!
That's why God made paper plates right...and plastic cutlery, disposable containers, plastic bags?...I just attained the Carbon Footprint of Bigfoot! My feet are pretty big already...shit.
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